This is not a research paper on Anger, only my thought
process on this topic, which kept lingering in my mind for a very long time.
What is Anger?
Anger is an emotion due to antagonism towards a person or
sometimes towards an object (?), when you feel that the person has done an
injustice or the object doesn’t meet your expectation or sometimes objects and
animals are ill treated as a vent out of anger that was caused by somebody
else.
Where it surge?
The irony is mostly we don’t get an opportunity to express
anger due to the following reasons;
1.
1.The person is superior to you, in terms of
“Money”, “Muscle” , “Matter” & “Position”
2.
2.The person is not in near vicinity and not
reachable
3.
3.The fear of relationship being severed
It’s so easy to express anger if all the above situations
goes vice versa, ie.
1. 1.
The person is inferior to you, in terms of
“Money”, “Muscle”, “Matter” & “Position”
2.
2.The person in the vicinity or reachable
3.
3.You don’t value the relationship
“Valuing the relationship” doesn’t mean hatred all the
time, it is more on psychological view point of the person or the relationship
is bound to you and you have every right to express or abuse.
The so called ‘Anger’ mostly surge into the weaker sex or on
whom we have an edge, in terms of dependency, relationship and family bonding.
The victims are mostly “kids” and “women” (sometimes men), for the fact that
they can’t defend but to put up with our aggression.
Is it normal?
Anger is a normal and healthy emotion, everyone will
experience when it is completely in control. You are a human when you have all emotions;
especially anger is in your control. You turn into a beast when anger engulfs
you and you in turn engulf all those who come across your way!
Research says nearly 125 million people in India have mental
illness problem, one of the cause is “Anger”.
Anger is caused due to societal pressure, upbringing style,
physical abuse, male dominance society, cultural factors, economical factors,
growing violence and corruption.
The very common formation:
When you are deprived of your basics, your emotions bloats
up, when your emotions are suppressed, your mind is filled with anger, when
there is no vent out for anger, that leads to violence, an abusive mentality
against a particular caste, creed, gender, sex and sometimes objects and
animals too.
The stardom makes the followers crazy and they get easily
instigated and we see the wars over the virtual industry stardom and so with
the political parties’ followers, every conspiracy leads to personal attacks.
Be it anything, you will witness the loss only for the followers and mediators
and never for the parties who got confronted.
Can Anger be positive?
Anger directed in the proper stream, will keep you healthy,
and leads to several revolution in family and in the world. Anger by the soldiers during the British
regime, triggered the fire for freedom fight, an insult due to racism, the
strong jolt felt, made Gandhi to start his freedom fight, constant suppression
and denial, made Anna Hazare to start his next freedom struggle for the country
from corruption.
Many emerged as strong personalities by stimulating their
anger constructively even though they were victimized by suppression. Michael
Jackson, Abraham Lincoln, Gandhi, and many political leaders in our current era
and many more including the common men and women in our day to day life can be
named as those who learnt to convert the anger as a stimulator to their success
instead of getting succumbed to anger.
How we can make it constructive?
We need to know how to stimulate our anger, how to control
and how to vent out. Direct confrontation mostly helps, clarifying the
preconceived notion about each other instead of feeding to the vengeance due to
constant perception building. Words play a key role in anger, if you hold
your tongue for a moment you will save a relationship for life. Abusive
words, disrespectful language leads to commotion.
In today’s world, everybody is overwhelmed with pressure and
in constant comparison of people above them in terms of money, fame, position,
education and beauty. The constant comparison makes them crazy and instigates
them to work hard, gain more. You are on the right track, if you know where to
go and where to stop and if you have the mental ability to accept failure and
success as two sides of the coin.
Anger, the trap
The day you fail, and when your mind stop thinking about
possible actions for your success, you get into a feeling of neglect, slowly
emerges into depression and results in extreme outlet of anger to all unknown!
Finally, when you are angry, hold on to your breath, give a
pause and shift your mind to think
different, from the other person’s point of view, ease down with words, do
express your dissatisfaction and anger in
a more constructive way rather than destructive.
At the end, we are all social animals and we can’t stand
alone by destroying every single relationship!
Get angry against all social injustice, but never get
trapped with words! To lose or to gain,
is all in your hand!
